Everything Doesn't Happen For A Reason and Stop Misusing 'God willing'
No, I do not think everything happens for a reason. I mean…not in the sense that we like throw that phrase around when something bad happens as a way to make peace with the situation--like it’s some part of God’s grand plan for your life.
And stop misusing the phrase “God willing.”
Okay, there, I said it. Now, let’s continue.
My brother dying. Yeah…that happened for a really unfortunate reason. He was addicted to opiates and he overdosed one night and died. That wasn’t God’s will for my brother.
I blamed God for a long time for my brother’s death. Everyone who thought they were giving some faith based condolence that would draw me closer to God in my time of grief, only took me farther away by telling me it was God’s plan, God’s will, just trust God, or God is in control.
I really did believe that it must have been God’s plan for my brother. So, why on heaven, hell or earth would I trust God if He was the one responsible for taking my brother away. That was the most absurd thing I had ever heard.
So, I didn’t. I would have told you I hated God. Come to find out, I didn’t know God. Not even a little bit. I blamed God for a lot of things that I know today were not His doing, His plan, or His will.
God is for us. He wants the best for us. I have no doubt his heart broke everytime my brother turned to drugs and everytime I tried to find the meaning of life in a bottle of booze. Which is why I cringe when people misuse the phrase “God willing”
I hear it all the time. “I’ll be sober for 2 years in August, God willing.” “I won’t go back out, God willing.” “My son will decide to go to rehab, God willing.”
Friends…all of this would be God’s will. I mean, seriously! You think God doesn’t want you to stay sober, wants to see you go back out, or wants your son to not choose a life free from drugs & alcohol. No, no and no.
Stop blaming God. Stop saying things that you think sound good, but really have no idea what it means. Everything doesn’t happen for a reason.
What I have learned through recovery is to find gratitude in everything…good and bad that has brought me where I am today. I have made a lot of mistakes…none of which were God’s will for my life. It was my self will run riot that got me into a lot of trouble. I have realized that God can certainly use our pain for purpose.
Step three of the 12 steps is turning your life and your will over to the care of God. This is something that baffled the hell out of me when I got to step 3 early in recovery.
What does that even mean? I don’t know what God’s will for my life is, but I know what it isn’t. I know one thing…God’s will is for me to stay sober, and any person, place or thing that is going to bring me closer to a drink probably isn’t God’s will for my life. I keep it simple. I don’t blame God for all the mistakes in this world.
After reciting the Lord’s prayer since the age of 5, now 30 years later, I finally understand what it means. “your will be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.” It means, God’s will is played out perfectly in Heaven, but rarely is that the case on earth.
I am far from perfect and I don’t always align my will with God’s. But I pray and I give God all the glory for my life today. I pray for the knowledge to know His will for my life and I pray for the ability to carry it out. I used to hate the phrase, Let Go & Let God, but today, it’s something I practice daily…you know, now that I actually know what it means!